Dream Journal : Not a Good Pet

July 20, 2014 2:03pm
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We were all staying at my grandparents’ house, though it was much bigger than in reality with several extra bedrooms and bathrooms off of each. Company was a mixture of family and friends and co-workers…

…and this thing that looked sort of like a baby pterodactyl…

Most of its similarities were that it was freaking nasty. I don’t remember how we had found it, but in the short time after we did it had trashed two rooms and killed a couple of people. Its beak was deadly – very long and very sharp, but also with crazy teeth on the inside of its mouth much different than what you would expect from a normal bird.

Of course, somehow *I* ended up holding it – under my arm with both hands clamped around its beak trying to keep it shut, and I spent twenty minutes frantically running around the house, trying to get someone to help me subdue the thing before I lost my grip and its killing spree resumed. It was flailing a lot, but we just didn’t have any place to put it – the closest was a dog cage, but we figured with teeth like that, it’d probably make short work of the thin metal bars.

Finally settling on duct taping its beak closed like you would an alligator, we found a roll of neon pink duct tape and managed to wrap him up, though we still didn’t know what to do with him from there. My friend said surprisingly seriously that I should put a leash on him and take him for a walk like a dog because he probably just needed to be outside, but I just looked at the droplets of blood all over my shirt from its past victims and said that wasn’t going to happen.

During this whole ordeal, somebody else had our employers on the phone, who saw the situation as more of a marketing opportunity than the extremely dangerous kill zone that the house had become. The boss wanted us to just hold tight so that they could think about it some more, and that on Monday they were going to setup a press conference to announce him to the world.

I pushed back very hard, saying that they had no idea what this thing was capable of, and that it had already killed two of our friends and needed to be contained in a proper research facility NOW.

Surprisingly, they said ok.

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