Great Expectations

Let it be known – I want to meet a woman whose best story doesn’t go something like, “This one time I was sooooo drunk…blah blah blah…hit a tree…blah blah blah…fucking hilarious…blah blah-dy blah…surprised I can even remember any of it at all…ha ha ha! Why of course I’ll have another…”

Is that really too much to ask?!

1 Comment

  1. This one time, I was so drunk, and like, I was with this guy, and he was like, “I’ve got a roofie with your name on it,” and I was like, “Yay date rape,” and I think there was a goat involved, and like I woke up naked in a puddle of my own vomit and someone else’s cum, and like oh my god it was sooooo funny! I can’t remember any of it and oh SHIT I have to get to class, high school starts at 8:00!

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