Twelve Reasons Why You Clearly Don’t Understand the Democratic Party

I think somebody could create a really popular website that just does nothing but corrects all of misinformed, erroneous crap that gets shared around on Facebook by all of our misinformed, republican friends and family members.

You know, crap like this:

I hope whoever put that together at least had some fun stringing misnomer after misnomer together all in one convenient, yet blatantly wrong “letter to the editor” because I don’t think I’ve read such a ridiculous misunderstanding of the opposite party since the last time that Sarah Palin opened her mouth.

Just a few words on some of my own favorites…

#1. Nobody wants to marry their Labradors, you stupid fuck. People, on the other hand – just like you and me – would like the right to marry one another because, well, all men are created equal.” That was in a pretty popular book a while ago – maybe you’ve heard of it.

#3. I’m sure in some ways you’re better and in some ways your government is actually better. How’s the last freeway that you built with your own money holding up? Or the public school, or the local art museum, or that homeless shelter that you no doubt support wholeheartedly, being so pro-life and all!

#4. Huh?

#5. Seriously – what do you need an AK-47 for, anyways?! What the hell kind of deer are you hunting out there that you have to have a semi-automatic assault rifle in your arsenal to be able to hold your ground with??? You know, I’m actually pretty firmly behind the Right to Bear Arms in principle, but when you start talking all crazy like we’re trying to take away your precious every five minutes, that’s where we start thinking that maybe just a few reasonable limitations might not be a terrible idea… 😯

#6. Like we learned in 5th grade science class, climate and weather are not the same thing.

#7. 2.4 million people die in the United States of America each year. Nearly 600,000 die of heart disease; 567k die from cancer. Over 36,000 people commit suicide each year, and 16,000 people are killed by other people. What’s your opinion on those epidemics around America??? For the last time, let’s frame your position correctly – you’re not pro-life, you’re just anti-choice – because if you were really pro-life, those numbers would bother you even more than the 1.2 million abortions that are performed each year. Why does your party put more value in those who haven’t even been born yet than those Americans who already walk beside us every day?

#10. Wait a second – which party wants to reverse Roe v. Wade and which one wants to ensure equal rights, including the right to marry, for all of our citizens again? The funny thing about rights is that they should never apply to just some of the people and those same people should certainly never be voting for them. Those kooks, as you so lovingly called them, have rights, too.

#12. And lastly, that particular position has been proven to be not even physically possible, though I suppose your party seems to have no problem refuting plenty of other proven facts and truths…

Unlike the letter above, let’s be perfectly clear – if you liked or shared this around on Facebook, and got a laugh out of reading this because you think that it perfectly defines everything that you’re against in our political system, you may as well have your Labrador go vote for you next time because you’re honestly going to hurt somebody getting behind the wheel of a car with brain damage like that. I have no problem admitting that the democratic party has plenty of faults, just like the republicans, but this list of twelve things doesn’t do justice in identifying any of them and if this is the kind of nonsense that you use to base your political opinion, just stop.

Make up your mind with actual information, not the misinformed rhetoric that 4,529 other idiots have already shared around on Facebook. Otherwise it just makes you look stupid, too.

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