Humor Columnist Survivor!!!

God, how could I forget about this???

Yours truly has managed to become an official contestant and I need your help! I haven’t really developed much of a strategy for this competition, so I’m pretty much depending on my dashing good looks and dazzling personality to get me through at least the first couple of weeks. You can lend your hand in making me the Ultimate Survivor by visiting the site every single day and voting for anybody other than me! I don’t really care who you vote for, as long as there’s somebody’s name other than mine on that ballot…

Ok, I do care, but it would be unsportsman-like of me to bad-mouth the other contestants…at least until I get some really good dirt on them. Vote today!!!

good news on the horizon…

I know I was definitely pleased to hear about this…

Lower Manhattan Development Corporation And Port Authority Unveil Six Concept Plans For World Trade Center Site, Adjacent Areas And Related Transportation (July 16, 2002)

The Lower Manhattan Development Corporation and the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey today unveiled six options for rebuilding the World Trade Center site and adjacent areas, focused on honoring those lost on September 11 and revitalizing Lower Manhattan. The plans are a milestone in the ongoing public process that will lead to final plans for the most important development project in New York City history. They suggest ways to use space on the site for a memorial, commercial and retail space, cultural facilities and other neighborhood amenities, a hotel, and a new transportation hub serving New York and New Jersey. Some plans also call for residential development in areas adjacent to the site.

I’ve never even been to New York City, so I really don’t have much of an opinion on which concept is the best – I’m just glad to see that it’s getting done in the first place! As far as I’m concerned, any building that’s 80-stories high looks pretty darn cool to me…

For more information, visit The LMDC, Lower Manhattan Development Corporation.

Coming Soon – this site may actually go online!!!

Yes, it’s true…

I was finally able to secure a new web host that keeps their servers online during the day, so hopefully this little ditty will be available to the public and everything fairly soon! Even though I’ve yet to serve anything with these guys yet, it already looks like they’re going to be about a million times better than the previous host which I had picked out to due the honors. Obviously, the site never even made it there, so if that doesn’t tell you anything…

If I had only one suggestion to anyone involved in the web hosting business, it would have to go something like this:

Settle 4 Less Web Hosting – Solutions with a Smile!!!

Mark my words, though – if the new host ends up sucking like our last two, I’m retiring and moving to Canada. I don’t know what I’ll do there, but it certainly won’t have anything to do with this internet-thingy…

chicks that rock…

Ok, once and for all, I’ll admit it – I’ve got a thing for teen pop music scene. I’m not ashamed…the people in the music store probably think I’m a pervert, but I’m fine with that – they have no idea! I think this genre of music gets a bad vibe simply because there are quite a few artists that royally suck and it pulls down the rest of the crowd. Really, there are a ton of rock ‘n roll bands that royally suck, but the entire image of rock ‘n roll still remains pure and untainted…unlike the teen pop genre which I believe has actual laws preventing anyone over the age of 14 from becoming interested…

Well call me jailbait then because I just can’t seem to get two new cds out of the rotation in my car and I think they deserve a little recognition…

Michelle Branch:

Spirit Room

Avril Lavigne:

Let Go

First thing’s first – yes, they’re both extremely hot – this goes without saying. Granted neither of them is Britney hot, but they could each certainly hold their own! Behind the breasts, though, these ladies have this little thing I like to refer to as talent which is commonly overlooked by the skeptics…and that’s just a damn shame because there’s actually some really good music on these two discs. These aren’t your typical pop-single, written by Diane Warren, MTV all-star hits – no offense to Miss Warren, of course! Let me break things down a bit further…

Michelle Branch – This is a very happy cd for the most part, although that doesn’t necessarily have to be a bad thing! Michelle’s debut cd might focus around love and relationships, but she’s just got the most beautiful voice that makes it all worthwhile. The songs sort of flop back and forth with regards to perspective, so if you’re in a lousy relationship and aren’t feeling up to the bouncy, cheerful tunes, just skip ahead to the next track and she’ll be back on your side! This one is a great choice for both long road trips and lazy Saturday afternoons…

Avril Lavigne – I got hooked on this girl a few weeks ago after hearing her first hit on the radio and was pleasantly surprised when I listened to the rest of the disc. Anyone who’s seen the video for Complicated knows that she’s a punk at heart, so it’s safe to report that this cd is a bit rougher than most female musician’s of her time – think a little like Fiona Apple, only minus the suicidal tendencies. Even though my own gender does make a few cameo appearances throughout this disc, Avril focuses on a wide range of topics including fame, growing up and tolerating differences among personalities. Sure, there’s a little bit of angry chick rock in here, but they do have a decent beat and she’s got more than enough counter-balance “happy” music here as well…

Wrapping things up, if you’re looking to add some new music to your collection and aren’t sure exactly what, I definitely suggest giving either one of these ladies a try. I’ve got a feeling that both of these girls are going to be around for a while, so you might as well make the best of things – trust me on this one! You may rant and jeer about appreciating Britney Spears and her cohorts, but it’s going to be much more difficult to find negativity for these two so jump on the bandwagon while they’re still relatively new!

Besides, couldn’t you use a little happiness in your already chaotic life??? 🙂

A Sad Day Under the Sea…

There’s been a death in the family. Well, sort of…

I’ve been having some problems with one of my fish tanks for a while now. It seems that its somehow managed to cultivate a type of super algae which I haven’t the faintest idea how to get rid of. It has a bad habit of clogging up my filter in less than a week after I’ve replaced it and that tends to get a bit pricey! I’d noticed the filter overflowing again earlier this week and had planned on changing it, but I’ve been so busy lately with non-disclosable law issues that I just never got around to it.

Well, I finally found time to get around to it last night, but it was too late. I came home from work to find my two oldest goldfish, Bananarama and Frederico sleeping very soundly at the bottom of the tank. “Don’t fish float when they die?” you ask? That just gives you an idea of how big these guys were! I’d had them for nearly five years and were certainly not under-fed during their time with me!

Of course, now I’m faced with two tasks. Figure out a way to get the damn algae out of the tank for good so that I don’t end up losing the other three in the process AND acquire a few new goldfish to replace those who have passed on to that big pond in the sky. Unfortunately, I’m extremely impatient and the thought of waiting years for them to get impressively large again is a very lousy feeling, but nobody ever said that losing those close to you was easy… 🙁

Damn – I almost got that out with a straight face! 😉

R.I.P.

Bananarama & Frederico

1997 – 2002

Your legacy will not be forgotten…

2002 Cartoonist’s Choice Awards

Congratulations are certainly in order, as I received the word earlier today that Barry over at InkTank.com took Best Gaming Comic this year with Angst Technology in the 2002 Cartoonist’s Choice Awards! There were quite a few good comics nominated this year, but if anybody deserves it, it’d definitely be Barry…

Nice job to all of the other winners as well! I know that now I won’t have to look far the next time I’m looking for some new comics to kill the time with! 😛

Heat wave…

Wow, I never thought I’d be saying this in Northern Michigan, but it is just way too hot… And to think I’m supposed to be in Florida right now??? I can’t stand living my life in front of a fan five days a week now, let alone all year long down there… 😕

Anyways, I did some domain registering this weekend and hopefully the site will be up sometime within the next week! There are still a few minor tweaks I want to do here and there, but overall I’m extremely happy with the way this whole thing has turned out. Besides, it has to go up in the next week – I’ve got too many projects for Just Laugh that I’m supposed to be working on…it’s definitely going to be a busy summer!

But that’s the way I like it. 😀

Bob and Tom – You Guys Rock!

Well, technically comedic-genius.com isn’t even up yet, but I had the privilege of attending an utterly amazing concert this weekend and simply can’t fight back the urge to write any longer! Besides, it’ll make the archives look better if there’s actually a little something in them when this beast finally does go online, right? 😉

The show in question was in fact a live performance by The Bob & Tom Band, of the famed nationally syndicated radio show, of course! Taking place at The Orbit Room in Grand Rapids, MI, the shows from both Friday and Saturday night collectively represent the first time the band has ever performed in Michigan, or at least that’s what the promotion said. Nevertheless, after faithfully listening to the show for over three years, it was about time to see the band in person and it saved me a trip out of state to boot…

Surprisingly, although I showed up as the opening theme song to the show was playing, I was able to get one of the better seats in the house – I guess there is one advantage to flying solo! The main floor was pretty packed, but I managed to score a table on the second level almost directly over the stage – close enough to see the entire performance, but far enough out of eyesight from the comedians to avoid any direct ridicule! This is a rule you can’t learn soon enough after you’ve seen a few comedians…

With the exception of Kristi Lee and Dean Metcalf, the entire cast was there – Bob Kevoian, Tom Griswold and Chick McGee, as well as several back-up vocalists who I was soon able to identify as characters in various sketches on their albums. The band was announced as a 20-piece extravaganza, although the numbers didn’t seem quite that high unless they were including multiple personalities, but they rocked just the same and provided a solid backbone for the entire show. Hell, I would’ve paid just to hear these guys jam, even without all of the comedic stunts…

And oh boy, there were certainly a few of these! The actual set list (found below, in no particular order) included nearly all of their greatest hits and even a few “specialized” pieces “just for Grand Rapids,” although I’m guessing that they can just as easily insert Chicago or Indianapolis or B.F.E. to succumb to any given audience. The most hilarious parts of the show, however, were actually how the cast interacted both with each other and with the audience members in between bits. Just as we’ve all heard on the radio each and every morning, everyone equally hates each other off-radio also, which leads to the witty banter which we’ve all become accustomed to by this point!

For the show which I saw on Saturday night, I must say that the MVP easily goes to the one and only Chick McGee! Whether he was defending his own sexuality, making shadow puppets on the breasts of the ladies on stage, or merely doing his best to distract the audience away from Tom while he was performing, Chick kept me on the edge of my seat wondering what he was going to think of next. He’s always been a personal favorite of mine on the show, so getting to see him in his natural environment was certainly a treat! Possibly the most entertaining moment of the night came as Chick found it necessary to deal with a heckler in the audience, whom happened to be sitting about six feet in front of me. It’s safe to say that the bar was making their money off of this guy, so he was fairly inebriated by the time of the incident. For an unknown reason, this guy decided that it was the appropriate time to yell out, “Chick sucks cock!” right in the middle of one of their songs. Going with the flow of things, Chick stopped Bob in the middle of the bit and recognized the asshole for what he really was! The show continued and the man seemed to quiet down, although about five minutes later, some very large security guards showed up and escorted him out, so I guess being the Sports Director of a nationally syndicated radio show has a little more pull than we would’ve thought!

It was an amazing night and I’d be one of the first people in line for tickets if they announced another show nearby tomorrow – I highly recommend catching this show the next time they’re in town! Obviously, their tour schedule is very limited as they’re only able to go on the road on the weekends, but it’s certainly worth your time and money to check out. For the complete Bob & Tom virgin, the show did get a bit dirty, as they were sure to take full opportunity to make-up for all of the FCC regulations that moderate their radio show, but for anybody who can enjoy a good dildo joke or the objectification of women in the name of sex, this is a show that you’re definitely going to love! I can’t guarantee that your girlfriend is going to enjoy the show, but after a few beers and a couple hours of non-stop laughter, it’ll be worth the effort…trust me! Do yourself a favor and go see The Bob and Tom Band the next time they’re in your neighborhood… 😀

Set List for Saturday, June 29, 2002 @ The Orbit Room, Grand Rapids

  • Blow Me a Kiss
  • Dear Penthouse
  • Everybody’s Pissed at Me
  • Snailman
  • Big Knockers
  • Paging Richard Smoker
  • Dicken’s Cider
  • Nasty Stuff (featuring The Chick McGee Experience)
  • Buzz, Buzz
  • We Are Smoking
  • Livin’ La Vida Polka
  • Kay
  • The Drinking Song
  • Captain Dildo
  • Trophy-Wife Barbee
  • Prisoner of Love
  • We’re Still Standing Tall