Motorcycle riders that opt to pass between two cars going 80+ mph on the freeway
Sorry, cyclists, but between the passing on dotted lines, shoulders, and pretty much anywhere else that you think you can fit your crotch-rocket, you’ve officially trumped distracted soccer moms on my list of people who annoy the hell out of me on the road. Check your Motorcycle Owner’s Handbook – it says you have the same rights as automobiles, and that includes staying between the lines and passing only on the right of way. Whereas my worst will probably be a nasty set of cuts and bruises if I fuck-up on the highway, yours will likely result in a funeral procession and an article in next week’s paper about bike safety for any collision at 80+ mph, so what’s fucking wrong with you?!
Helmet law??? Bah! To quote Jerry Seinfeld, “The only thing dumber than the helmet is the helmet law – the point of which is to protect a brain that is functioning so poorly, it’s not even trying to stop the cracking of the head that it’s in…”
I would like to point out that the only ones that are really bad at this are the flipped-up-collar-on-their-polo-shirt frat boys that only got motorcycles because their friends have them, and in order to be cool, one must conform to the group. And also because they get equally stupid and vapid girlfriends thanks to their “bad boy” image of owning a stylish and highly technological pieces of equipment that their dumb asses are too stupid to comprehend properly.
I’m sorry, give me a touring bike and some black leather chaps any day. Getting a bike for wearing your shorts and hemp necklace and NOTHING ELSE is a recipe for disaster. You get what you deserve.
To paraphrase Bill Hicks, it’s good for thinning the gene pool now and then.
Haha I’ve always wondered what it would be like to just open my door really fast, but then, I’d need a new door, and I’m selfish that way. I’ll not sacrifice my door for the greater good.