That’s one BIG Twinkie…

July 19, 2003 6:25pm
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I decided to make a visit down to camp last night, which turned out being both refreshing and bizarre at the same time. I had actually considered going back again this year, but the lack of adequate pay coupled with the fact that not very many of my previous co-workers would be around were enough to change my mind, plus I finalized that five years was quite long enough to spend persuading hyper kids that nature is, indeed, their friend! It was an interesting trip, nonetheless, because nearly the entire staff this year is comprised of fifteen and sixteen year-olds, minus maybe four or five of my older friends from years past. What was probably the most odd of all was seeing all of these kids whom I taught years ago, now teaching other kids the same things – kind of neat, makes me feel a bit older, but it’s good to see that the job is still getting done all the same.

I also nearly considered taking on the ever-popular Atkins diet this afternoon, but fortunately my absolute lust for all that is yummy quickly got the best of me and I abandonned that little goal before I went shopping for brocoli and eggs. I was just sitting down in front of the TV, preparing to enjoy a bit of Sports Night, when it occurred to me just how delicious some potato chips would be, yet of course, anyone who’s done any research on this particular diet whatsoever knows that the first several weeks are very critical to your overall success – no bread, no sugars, no fruit, and absolutely no snack foods! I think what did me in was when I got to thinking that even if I did manage to lose weight under this plan, you pretty much have to continue a variation of the same ideals FOREVER to avoid getting huge again and I don’t care how fat I become, giving up my favorite Made-Rite Wavy Sweet Barbecue potato chips will never be a solution to any problem that I’m willing to accept! Call me a greedy bastard, but if world peace rested on the concept of my giving up these wonderful treats for the rest of my days, then we’re just going to have to find another way to get along because it ain’t gonna happen…

So needless to say, I’m back on the old stand-by diet again, which isn’t technically a diet at all, but seeing as I didn’t really give it much of a chance the first time around, it seemed only fair that I give it a second shot. I know that it just isn’t physically possible for me to completely cut Dr. Pepper out of my diet, but I’m thinking that if I at least get my water intake close to the eight glasses per day, it should at least help to drop the number of cans that I consume every day back into the single digits! On that aspect alone, I would’ve never made the whole Atkins deal – a single can contains about 40 grams of Carbohydrates, while your entire diet for the entire day under this plan only allows for 20 grams per day, all of which are supposed to come from meats and veggies. I drink more than half a can per day, so without even factoring in the Oreos and chips and Chinese take-out and pizza, I’m already screwed! I do honestly still believe, however, that simply sticking to the whole exercising thing and moderating my eating habits, even just a little, should be enough to get things back under control…

And by some chance that this doesn’t work, there’s always liposuction, right???

One Response to That’s one BIG Twinkie…

  1. Anonymous says:

    Broccoli.

    Abandoned.

    http://www.dictionary.com/

    You’re welcome.

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