ScottSevener.com

I have no problem admitting that I was one of the original haters who thought that this movie was going to be terrible … because it is.

However despite the spin that tried to make it out to be merely a sexist objection to the all-female cast, I’ve come to believe that at least for most of us, it didn’t have anything to do with the cast … sort of.

Overall, what failed this year’s Ghostbusters reboot wasn’t the cast, but unequivocally without a doubt the script because frankly it was uncreative and undoubtedly unoriginal, to the point where it felt like it expected the weight of the beloved Ghostbusters franchise to support it no matter what … and it just didn’t.

The thing about reboots is that they still need to bring something fresh and new to the franchise – something more than just girl power, in this case – but the story itself was kind of boring and in many places just seemed to borrow from the original movie when the writers couldn’t be bothered to come up with a new story device. To that point, things that were probably meant to seem like nods to the franchise – like crossing the streams and fighting with the mayor and bringing the old logo to life – just felt like weak writing instead of proper tributes that the original Ghostbusters deserved.

Even the cameos from the original cast were kind of meh with no real acknowledgement of how they served in the original story.

And so I can’t really blame the cast itself for what ultimately seemed to be a case of bad, uninspired writing because I sincerely think that another version of this movie could’ve been just fine, female cast and all. The story isn’t that hard to write…

30 years after the original events in New York, the original cast has long since been retired as heroes when a new threat appears and these women who grew up on their paranormal tales attempt to dust off the old legends to take over the reins. The story contains plenty of nods to the original movies because they’re shared as anecdotes by the original cast, and in the end the new Ghostbusters save the day and the retired Ghostbusters – along with the crabby mayor – are the first in line to applaud their successors.

The whole stink when the original rumors of this all-female reboot came about wasn’t that girls can’t be Ghostbusters, but that’s all we were given and fans of the franchise demanded more than that. I’m sure that some were sexist, but not all, with many folks like myself just wanting to see more effort put forth than, “It’s Ghostbusters, but with women!” because a simple gender swap is no basis for any story, and it shows in the final product because they didn’t put crap into the writing and the movie fell on its face.

If anything, it did a disservice to the women who were cast because to take on a franchise as beloved like the Ghostbusters, they needed a good script to do their legacy justice. Instead they were given throwaway gags and re-used plot devices that didn’t add anything new to the franchise and just left the rest of us saying, “I told you so.”

All this movie needed to be great was someone who cared enough to write a new Ghostbusters story and then weave elements from the past into it. You can’t just swap out the actors and redo the same story and expect fans to rave about a new Ghostbusters story because it really wasn’t, and that’s a shame because if Sony had really been committed to doing a new Ghostbusters movie, they could’ve done it.

But instead we got this and it got overblown into this big gender war when it really was all just a case of bad writing. 🙁

P.S. Also, I get that it was intended to be a summer blockbuster and all because that’s how the first two were presented, but why not hold off and put them out in October to piggyback on the whole promotional season for Halloween instead??? 

Was this supposed to be DC’s long-awaited response to The Avengers?!

Woof.

I didn’t really care for Man of Steel, but it was alright … at least it had a decent plot up until the Superman vs. Zod destroy everything battle scene that just seemed over the top even for a superhero movie. But this one was just blah … almost boring … frankly, it felt very forced.

First of all, I hated the characters – Henry Cavil returning as Superman had even less emotion than ever, and Batman … I don’t even think it was Ben Affleck’s fault – he was sort off irrelevant due to how polar opposite the character was written from what we’ve come to expect from Batman, especially after the epic trilogy that Christopher Nolan gave us.

So before, Batman used to be this ace investigator with all sorts of neat gadgets, and a set of morals, and he was all stealthy and altruistic … but this Batman is kind of an idiot because he steals his intel instead of doing any real work, he’s violent and vengeant, and he wears a suit of armor like he’s fucking Iron Man or Sir Galahad … WTF?!

How Batman even runs around in that massive suit is beyond me…

Oh yes, and Jesse Eisenberg – the guy who played Mark Zuckerberg in The Social Network – should’ve stuck to Facebook because he was pretty awful here, too, like he was trying to play The Joker, but without any real plot.

I mean, if we didn’t all know that Lex Luthor is Superman’s arch-nemesis, I’m not sure if we would’ve had any real indication why he was fucking with him. Maniacal, but without any real backstory like The Joker to make us care.

Anyway, pretty much the whole plot was kind of a bore, which again is tough compared to the rich and vibrant storyline that we saw Christian Bale go through in The Dark Knight trilogy. I was actually surprised because just watching the blockbuster names scroll by in the opening credits, it really seemed like it should’ve been a knockout movie … but Jeremy Irons as Alfred??? The role literally felt beneath him the entire movie, and that’s after Michael Caine absolutely blew the role away!

Even Lawrence Fishburne, who I know played the same character in Man of Steel, just felt miscast and out of place – like somebody booked all of these grade A actors and then never thought that they actually needed a worthwhile script to read.

It seriously felt so weak, it was like a child wrote it – Batman should steal the kryptonite to use against Superman, then Lex should kidnap Superman’s girlfriend…AND HIS MOM, TOO – you know, just in case one isn’t enough! And can we bring General Zod back with those laser eyes just like Superman’s … but maybe make him look like one of the trolls out of The Hobbit because those were really sweet!

Oh yeah, and in the end we’re gonna kill off Superman. You know, because what better way to tease Justice League than by killing off their leader before they even have a chance to assemble or whatever their catchphrase is supposed to be.

I mean, seeing Wonder Woman was neat for about the first 15 seconds, but then to instantly have her infinitely stronger than Batman, too, kind of made you wonder why Batman was even in the movie in the first place. The only time he really stood a chance against Superman was after taking an uncharacteristic potshot and even that was only temporary, so what’s the point?

And as a final thought, I’m kind of tired of this whole political back and forth between humans and superheroes in these movies, too. When I watch a superhero story unfold, I don’t care what senators think, and I don’t want to see our heroes standing before Congress or signing contracts that we know they’re not going to abide by anyways. If there’s that much bullshit about humans not being able to weigh the good with the bad, let’s see some superhero action in other realms for a while and let the humans deal with shit on their own for a while!

Seeing Superman standing before a Congressional hearing was embarrassing, and he didn’t even have a chance to leave with a good quip like Black Widow always does.

Were the old Superman movies this bad, too? This kind of makes me curious to go back and watch the classic movies with Christopher Reeve because those are supposed to be great. 

This version, sadly, was not.

Great movie – Will Smith nailed the accent to a T and I was surprisingly engaged despite not caring the least bit about sports, however we can’t really discuss this movie without bringing up the elephant in the room…

Why in the world do we still play football if it’s so freaking dangerous?!?!?!

As we saw the doctor’s research pan out and then begin to hit the public eye, it almost began an eerie foreshadowing of how the movie was ultimately going to end because clearly with the NFL still raking in billions every year, it’s not like this research that was published more than a decade ago has had any sort of significant impact on the perception and enjoyment of American football across the country.

Thankfully the story ended somewhat happily with Dr. Omalu continuing his investigative passion after turning down a lucrative government job offer, despite the league’s dumbfounding response where they kind of, sort of listened, but at the end of the day they’ve settled lawsuits that they tried to cover up the impact of concussions without actually taking any steps forward to help reduce the impact in the future!!!

I guess that’s what I was waiting to hear, even if just in the closing commentary before the credits, that perhaps new advancements in helmet technology or something was working hard to prevent these injuries from devastating the players after they’ve left their prime, but while they’re still enjoying their hard-earned retirement … and yet nothing of the sort was really offered up in that regard, which is sad because if you do the math, figure that it’s roughly a few hundred players in the NFL at a time taking these deadly risks every game, and millions of fans idolize the sport while billions of dollars are being made in the process…

…but still, is all of that worth it if the very players you’re cheering on the fields are literally killing themselves for the sport of the game?

I mean, it quickly becomes a complicated debate because if we’re being honest here – most of us do things that are bad for us all of the time, whether it’s not taking care of our health or driving less than responsibly on the road or even things like substance abuse, etc… We all take risks that gamble with lives, be it out of laziness or in exchange for pleasure or addiction, and so from that angle when you consider just how passionate people are about this sport, it’s not really a surprise that findings that could/should challenge the viability of the game wouldn’t exactly be greeted with open arms if it could mean having to find something else to do on Sunday nights.

It’s mostly just a tragic tale for me, not being in the slightest bit vested in football myself, aside from in general just not wanting to hear of people dying of preventable diseases, that is. It seems like common sense to me – brain fragile, don’t bash brain into other brains – but then again, there are plenty of other things that I don’t get about professional sports like the amount of public money that gets dumped into building new stadiums, only to have the teams blackout games for local viewers if the stands don’t get filled, but I digress.

Final thoughts – fantastic movie, amazing performance by Will Smith, and there’s no way my kids are going to play football without one hell of a fight. 🙁