Oh yeah, and next Tuesday is scheduled to be the most awesomest day in August:
Only one more day…
…and my week of twelve hour work days will finally be over. The good news is that when I get paid in two weeks, I’ll have enough to buy the rest of my car from the bank. The bad news is that I haven’t gotten squat done all week because I’ve spent so much time at work – hopefully I can get mostly caught up this weekend without sleeping through the whole thing, but I make no promises! Tomorrow night I’m grilling out steaks after I get home from work, then it’s just me, a bottle of Corona, and my laptop as I pound out a couple new chapters that I’ve been contemplating for Leaving Miami…and maybe I’ll work on some of those deadlines, too…
Where has the summer gone? No, seriously – it’s freakin’ August already! It won’t be long before there’s snow and ice all over the ground and Santa Claus starts doing his thing once again…he does deliver to the beach, though, doesn’t he???
Random Notes:
Why are the only shows that I might actually want to watch on HBO Latino???
Somehow I managed to lose a book of checks.
Either that or they got ordered with a really bizarre starting number, but I’ve done the math and I just don’t see how that’s possible. It’s not like it’s a huge deal – there’s not a whole lot of money in there anyways, but it seems kind of stupid to have to buy another eight books of the things when I’m going to be changing banks and addresses in a few months anyways. It took me something like two years to go through the last batch that I ordered – why doesn’t anybody sell these things only a couple books at a time???
Another Tale of Two Summers...
“Who knew that lost luggage would be the very least of their problems?”
Are you a writer who’s looking to flex his or her creative skills this summer? How about one that could just really use a new project to help pass the time?! Either way, Just Laugh magazine has just the thing that can help cure your summertime blues in the form of our latest creative collaboration entitled, Another Tale of Two Summers… and frankly, if you answered ‘YES’ to either of the questions above, we happen to think that you just might be perfect for the job!
This story stems back to a project we did last year called A Tale of Two Summers… which followed the path of two unsuspecting young ladies who found themselves in a bit of a pickle when they discovered that their boss was involved with some shady business. Our tale this year picks up where the last ended and the girls are taking a well-deserved vacation to Bermuda, or at least they think they are…
We’re still looking for writers to help lead our heroines along on their journey, so please check out the details on our website if you’re interested! A submission form can also be found at this same address – just click on the ‘Help Wanted’ link on the left-hand side of the page:
http://www.justlaugh.com/waste/anothertale/
Applicants will be accepted pretty much until the story is completed, so it’s never too late to sign yourself up for a piece of the action! In the meantime, enjoy the show…
I have a blister on my little toe – a blister that is nearly larger than the whole toe itself. It doesn’t feel very good at all.
One word: AWESOME! I’ve so gotta get out to Vegas one of these days…
Las Vegas Groups Protest Naked ‘Bambi’ Hunts
LAS VEGAS (Reuters) – Outraged by a Las Vegas company that claims to offer men a chance to stalk and shoot naked women in the Nevada desert with paintball guns, women’s groups and government agencies were scrambling to find a way to shut down such “Bambi” hunts.
“As soon as I found out about this, I called for an investigation,” Las Vegas Mayor Oscar Goodman said. “Las Vegas is a place where anything goes, but this crosses the line if this is real.”
Real Men Outdoor Productions Inc., insists it is doing nothing illegal and only providing another variety of adult entertainment in a city celebrated for sin.
<<FULL STORY>>
“I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory…”
http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/bloodninja.php
I decided to make a visit down to camp last night, which turned out being both refreshing and bizarre at the same time. I had actually considered going back again this year, but the lack of adequate pay coupled with the fact that not very many of my previous co-workers would be around were enough to change my mind, plus I finalized that five years was quite long enough to spend persuading hyper kids that nature is, indeed, their friend! It was an interesting trip, nonetheless, because nearly the entire staff this year is comprised of fifteen and sixteen year-olds, minus maybe four or five of my older friends from years past. What was probably the most odd of all was seeing all of these kids whom I taught years ago, now teaching other kids the same things – kind of neat, makes me feel a bit older, but it’s good to see that the job is still getting done all the same.
I also nearly considered taking on the ever-popular Atkins diet this afternoon, but fortunately my absolute lust for all that is yummy quickly got the best of me and I abandonned that little goal before I went shopping for brocoli and eggs. I was just sitting down in front of the TV, preparing to enjoy a bit of Sports Night, when it occurred to me just how delicious some potato chips would be, yet of course, anyone who’s done any research on this particular diet whatsoever knows that the first several weeks are very critical to your overall success – no bread, no sugars, no fruit, and absolutely no snack foods! I think what did me in was when I got to thinking that even if I did manage to lose weight under this plan, you pretty much have to continue a variation of the same ideals FOREVER to avoid getting huge again and I don’t care how fat I become, giving up my favorite Made-Rite Wavy Sweet Barbecue potato chips will never be a solution to any problem that I’m willing to accept! Call me a greedy bastard, but if world peace rested on the concept of my giving up these wonderful treats for the rest of my days, then we’re just going to have to find another way to get along because it ain’t gonna happen…
So needless to say, I’m back on the old stand-by diet again, which isn’t technically a diet at all, but seeing as I didn’t really give it much of a chance the first time around, it seemed only fair that I give it a second shot. I know that it just isn’t physically possible for me to completely cut Dr. Pepper out of my diet, but I’m thinking that if I at least get my water intake close to the eight glasses per day, it should at least help to drop the number of cans that I consume every day back into the single digits! On that aspect alone, I would’ve never made the whole Atkins deal – a single can contains about 40 grams of Carbohydrates, while your entire diet for the entire day under this plan only allows for 20 grams per day, all of which are supposed to come from meats and veggies. I drink more than half a can per day, so without even factoring in the Oreos and chips and Chinese take-out and pizza, I’m already screwed! I do honestly still believe, however, that simply sticking to the whole exercising thing and moderating my eating habits, even just a little, should be enough to get things back under control…
And by some chance that this doesn’t work, there’s always liposuction, right???